Public Restrooms

I'm pretty sure that every parent eventually earns a few public restroom horror stories throughout their child rearing years. I've only really got the one so far, and fortunately it wasn't that bad; although it did raise some questions.

After dropping mom off at a work the other day, Gia said she needed to go pee. I parked and we went inside to the first floor Men's room. Pretty much every time we go into a large, public bathroom, Gia makes loud chirping sounds the entire time, just to hear her voice echo. She was doing that while she pee'd, then I cleaned her up and pulled her off the toilet so I could use it. I usually end up going to the bathroom, looking over my shoulder the whole time telling her not to open the stall, no, I don't want her to wait outside by herself, and stop touching every thing, it's dirty. Instead, she is standing right behind me, leaning around and singing, "Don't forget to shake Daddy!!" Then I tell her to knock it off and go stand on the other side of the stall. I finish up and she starts singing, "Daaaaa-aaaaad, I saw your elephant trunk!"

I'm so glad that no one else happens to be in the bathroom with us, because this is really getting out of hand. First, I try not to go to the bathroom in front of her, and I sure as hell don't instruct her on the male system of peeing; so I have no idea where she learned about post pee shaking. Second, I certainly don't call any part of my body an "elephant trunk." I have no idea where she learns this stuff. When she goes to Grandma's house, it is all girls. I think I'm going to have to make Gloria cancel her Cinemax.

Also, a few weeks ago I accidentally killed one of our fish. Here is Gia holding it on a plate.

 I also had Gloria measure it.

Gloria had the fish on the plate. I was asleep when the corpse was discovered. So I'm asleep in bed, and Gloria comes into the bedroom and kicks me awake. I tell her, "What the hell? I'm sleeping!" She is standing there with this plate above my head and I'm thinking, "Awesome, breakfast in bed. About time." So I sit up and she shoves this plate full of dead, cold fish in my face. Let's just say that I was a bit disappointed.